Cartoon Pyramid With Phil Johnston And Mo Willems
NPR
We team our whimsical VIPs, Disney screenwriter Phil Johnston and children's book author Mo Willems, to play a game about famous cartoon animals.
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NPR
OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

Welcome back to NPR's ASK ME ANOTHER. I'm Ophira Eisenberg, and we're coming to you from SF Sketchfest at the Castro Theatre in San Francisco.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Now please welcome our VIP, the co-writer of "Wreck-It Ralph" and the upcoming Disney film "Zootopia," Phil Johnston.

(APPLAUSE)

PHIL JOHNSTON: Hello.

EISENBERG: Welcome.

JOHNSTON: Thank you, good to be here.

EISENBERG: Is this your first trivia show?

JOHNSTON: Public one, yes, yes, yes.

EISENBERG: Public one, got it, mostly you play alone.

JOHNSTON: Do a lot of at-home trivia.

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: Self-trivializing.

EISENBERG: Self-trivial.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: You are a successful screenwriter, comedy writer, but your first job out of college was as a weatherman in Minnesota.

JOHNSTON: Oh, I'm so glad we can talk about this, yes.

EISENBERG: Yes.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: So I mean, how did that happen? Were you really good at just saying in a cheery way, like, it's 30 degrees?

JOHNSTON: Apparently, I was very good at lying because I knew nothing about weather. I majored in journalism and wanted to be a newspaper reporter and ended up getting a job at a small television station in Rochester. And my third day on the job, the news director said our weather guy quit for the morning show, so can you do weather? And of course I can do weather. I can do anything.

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: And the disservice I did to the farmers and people who relied on a good weather forecast of southern Minnesota, it's astonishing.

EISENBERG: So then you wrote lots of scripts that, you would say, did not get made, but you made a living...

JOHNSTON: Yes.

EISENBERG: ...Writing scripts...

JOHNSTON: Oh, yeah.

EISENBERG: ...In Hollywood.

JOHNSTON: A close relative of mine when my first movie "Cedar Rapids" got made said to me, how are you going to handle success when you've had so much failure?

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: No, I sold lots of TV shows and movies and - over a period of years, none of which got made. And then, yeah, then suddenly, they started getting made, and life got easier because then I could say, yeah, I'm a screenwriter, or what have you done, and I could say what I've done, and it just - my existential dilemma was over, the whole if you're a writer but no one reads it and no one sees it, are you really a writer?

EISENBERG: Right.

JOHNSTON: It's a challenge.

EISENBERG: And then the next project that we know after that is "Wreck-It Ralph."

JOHNSTON: Right.

EISENBERG: How do you go from a comedy like "Cedar Rapids" to a animated - about videogames characters, yeah?

JOHNSTON: Family film, yeah, I had written a script before "Cedar Rapids" called Jeremy Orme Is A Pervert. It's loosely based on the pornography I sold as a young man and...

EISENBERG: All right, you're going to have to elaborate.

JOHNSTON: I would buy Playboys and penthouses from this ninth-grader. I was in seventh grade. I would buy them for $1, and then I would sell them to other seventh-graders for $3...

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: ...Sometimes $5, if it was like a hustler, I would easily do $5. And I had a fort above the garage, and that's where I kept the stash, and I had, like, 50 or 60 magazines ready to go. I mean, there were customers, there were willing buyers, and my mother and father went up when December rolled around to get the storm windows out of the garage, and, you know, they had ended there.

EISENBERG: They saw your stock.

JOHNSTON: My Larry Flynt days stopped.

EISENBERG: And you're like, no, mom, it's a business. It's a business.

JOHNSTON: Yeah, yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: I bought Air Jordans with the $86 I had made before I was caught.

(APPLAUSE)

JOHNSTON: Nineteen eighty-five.

EISENBERG: So this movie coming out, "Zootopia," is described as an action buddy comedy neo-noir adventure.

JOHNSTON: Wow.

EISENBERG: Yeah.

JOHNSTON: Who described it that way?

EISENBERG: That was a...

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: That was a...

JOHNSTON: It's a really - all of those things. It's a very funny movie about - it takes place in a world where humans never existed, so it's a talking animal movie.

EISENBERG: So how do you prepare research for writing comedy for animals? Are you looking at animals?

JOHNSTON: I have a cat.

EISENBERG: You have a cat.

JOHNSTON: I have a cat. No, the initial idea, the filmmakers - Byron Howard is the director, one of the directors in the movie, along with Rich Moore, and they went all over the world studying animal behavior and went to Africa and all that kind of stuff. And I, you know, I just come in and say, well, would my cat do that?

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: And that's how I judge everything.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Yes, speaking of your cat, you told our producers that you know a lot about feline gender reassignment surgery.

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: I like to think I do.

EISENBERG: OK.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Has your cat had this surgery?

JOHNSTON: My cat has had this surgery.

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: So we got this cat, Wayne, and he's awesome, but after, like, three months, he starts peeing, like, every five minutes, just these little dollops of pee in the littler box. So we take him in, and they go, there are there crystals in his urethra. And they give him a catheter, and they had to do that a few times. And they said, listen, it's not working. So we have a couple of options. We can put him to sleep. We can let the bladder explode, which is not a good plan.

EISENBERG: No.

JOHNSTON: Or we can make the hole bigger by cutting off his penis and giving him a vagina.

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: And I said, absolutely that's what we're going to do.

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: And it's approximately the Blue Book value of a '98 Accord...

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: ...To get this done, should anyone be curious.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Phil, beyond delightful.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: All right, since you're writing dialogue for cartoon animals, we decided to build an entire game around that idea. And to be your teammate, we found someone perfect. We have a man who's also made a career out of putting words into animals' mouths. It's children's book author and our good friend Mo Willems.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Hey.

MO WILLEMS: Hi, hi.

JOHNSTON: Hello, hello.

WILLEMS: Hi.

EISENBERG: Hey, Mo.

WILLEMS: Hi, hi, hello.

EISENBERG: Great to have you back on the show, last time you were on the show, you got a ASK ME ANOTHER T-shirt, I believe.

WILLEMS: Yes.

EISENBERG: Well, you won one. You haven't worn through that one yet.

WILLEMS: No, it's good.

EISENBERG: It's in pretty pristine...

WILLEMS: It's all good.

EISENBERG: OK, do you feel like writing for animals, characters that are animals rather than humans, gives you more liberty?

WILLEMS: I think so. I started out not writing for animals. I was very, like - I wrote for animated people, but animals are - yeah, they're easier to draw.

(LAUGHTER)

WILLEMS: Yeah, you sort of - I think you fall into it. I mean, initially, I didn't - I mean, all my animated cartoons were with characters, human characters because I didn't want to be kiddie, you know.

EISENBERG: Yeah.

WILLEMS: But now it's just - it's fun. I like animals. And you escape a lot of - you don't have to worry about social things. You don't have to worry about race or where they live or where they're - they're just animals.

EISENBERG: They're animals.

WILLEMS: So you're allowed to have a lot more freedom.

EISENBERG: You have a series "Elephant And Piggie."

WILLEMS: Yes.

EISENBERG: Twenty-five books.

WILLEMS: Yes, the last book is coming out in May.

EISENBERG: Yeah, you're ending it.

WILLEMS: The final - thank you for the applause.

(LAUGHTER)

WILLEMS: Thank you, mom.

(LAUGHTER)

WILLEMS: Thank you very, very much.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Why are you ending it? Is their emotional journey over?

WILLEMS: Yeah, I mean, I think ultimately, ultimately, I wanted it be "Mary Tyler Moore's Show" and not "Happy Days."

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Right, got it.

WILLEMS: So I - and it's time, you know? It's - these characters, I know them. I love them. They're really fun to be with. But I got to a point where I realized every time I was making an "Elephant And Piggie" book, I wasn't making something that scared me.

EISENBERG: So you wanted a challenge.

WILLEMS: I want to be scared.

EISENBERG: Is there going to be anything in the final book that...

WILLEMS: They get hit by a bus...

EISENBERG: Yeah, there you go.

(LAUGHTER)

WILLEMS: ...Driven by a pigeon.

(LAUGHTER)

WILLEMS: No, actually, the book is called "The Thank You Book" because it is a giant thank you to my audience, you know. I got to spend 10 years with these characters, and I only got to do it because kids were reading it. So it's a pretty on-the-nose book about saying thank you.

EISENBERG: All right, so we have a great game for the two of you. We are going to have you kind of work together. Phil, you are going to get a list of famous animated cartoon animals, and you have to get Mo to guess who they are by speaking in their voice.

JOHNSTON: Oh, great.

WILLEMS: Oh.

JOHNSTON: OK.

EISENBERG: OK, so you just have to give us dialogue. For example, that character might say their catchphrase. The only catch is that you can't say any part of the answer with your clue. So if the answer is Donald Duck, you can't say Donald or duck, or you'll hear this.

(SOUNDBITE OF BUZZER)

EISENBERG: So that sounds means move onto the next clue, and if you get stuck, you can pass, and you've got two minutes on the clock. Are you ready?

JOHNSTON: I'm born ready.

EISENBERG: OK.

WILLEMS: OK, here we go.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: The game begins now.

JOHNSTON: Hey, what's up, Doc?

WILLEMS: Donald Duck, Donald Duck.

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: Wrong.

WILLEMS: Bugs Bunny.

JOHNSTON: Yes.

EISENBERG: Right.

JOHNSTON: Oh, dear Lord, who is this? Pass.

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: Right here. Oh, let's go some...

WILLEMS: Shaggy, that's Shaggy.

JOHNSTON: The other one.

WILLEMS: You said Shaggy.

JOHNSTON: The other one.

WILLEMS: The dog, Scooby-Doo.

JOHNSTON: Yeah, that's it.

EISENBERG: Yes.

JOHNSTON: That's it.

(APPLAUSE)

WILLEMS: I went to film school.

JOHNSTON: Yeah, so did I.

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: Kurosawa (ph).

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: Here I come to save the day.

WILLEMS: Oh, that is Dudley Do-Right.

JOHNSTON: A little tiny rodent but really strong.

WILLEMS: Oh, he's a mouse, yes, super. He's a powerful mouse.

JOHNSTON: Yeah, yeah, I'm making a muscle. I'm making a muscle, alliterative.

WILLEMS: Hyper, super bat mouse, spider mouse, maximum mouse.

JOHNSTON: Very close, it starts...

WILLEMS: A big, giant nose mouse.

JOHNSTON: Rhymes with flighty.

WILLEMS: Mighty mice, Mighty Mouse.

JOHNSTON: Yes,

EISENBERG: Yes.

JOHNSTON: Yes, good.

(APPLAUSE)

JOHNSTON: I am a very sexy French skunk.

(LAUGHTER)

WILLEMS: That's Pepe Le Pew.

JOHNSTON: That's right.

EISENBERG: Yes.

WILLEMS: There we go.

JOHNSTON: Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na (ph).

WILLEMS: I do know who that is.

JOHNSTON: Yeah, like, he's banging his...

WILLEMS: That is Woodrow - Woody Woodpecker.

JOHNSTON: Woodrow Woodpecker, that's right.

EISENBERG: Yes, indeed.

JOHNSTON: Oh, she's a fish that is just so confused.

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: I'm such a confused fish.

WILLEMS: Oh.

JOHNSTON: I don't know where I'm going.

WILLEMS: Yes, that's...

JOHNSTON: I'm confused about everything. I have a talk show.

WILLEMS: Confused fish.

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: The woman who I am impersonating now, I like dancing, you know.

WILLEMS: Right, right, OK, got it, right, that's "Finding Nemo."

JOHNSTON: That's right, except the other one is called...

WILLEMS: Called - oh, the fish has a name.

JOHNSTON: The new one coming out.

WILLEMS: There's another one.

JOHNSTON: That's right.

WILLEMS: And it has a name, his fish.

JOHNSTON: It rhymes with Dory...

WILLEMS: Dory, Dory.

EISENBERG: Yes.

JOHNSTON: You got it. OK, boy, do I like lasagna.

(LAUGHTER)

JOHNSTON: Oh, sure is good, oh, man.

WILLEMS: The fact that I know this one quicker is worse. It is Garfield.

JOHNSTON: Yeah, yeah, that...

EISENBERG: Yes.

JOHNSTON: ...Depressive, morbidly obese cat.

(SOUNDBITE OF WHISTLE)

JOHNSTON: Oh.

EISENBERG: Oh, that's time.

WILLEMS: That's it. That's all we got.

EISENBERG: So the one you passed on was Sylvester the Cat. We gave you eight, and you got seven. So congratulations. You both win ASK ME ANOTHER Rubik's Cubes. I know.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: And we are totally thrilled to have had you on. Thank you so much, Mo Willems, for rejoining us.

WILLEMS: Thank you.

EISENBERG: Thank you so much, Phil Johnston. Go see "Zootopia."

JOHNSTON: OK, take care, guys.

(APPLAUSE)

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